WTF THE FUCK IS GOING ON?

Seriously, dude, what the heck is going on here? It's like a shitstorm of crazy, and I'm just trying to figure out it all. Is this even real life? This whole thing is making my head spin. Can someone please shed some light on before I lose it? What Fucking Fuck?! Dude, this is totally insane. I'm freaking right now. It's like a monkey just fli